Lets Shake Our Little Tush On the Catwalk

A few weeks ago, Patty Puss sent out an email asking if any of us were interested in going to a local fashion show. Well, of course I wanted to go. This was going to be either a big flop or a big hit. Either way I wanted to have a front row seat to whatever the outcome was going to be. We decided it would be sort of fun to dress up for the event. We really don't have many occasions to dress up at Calvert County events. We are a simple County. Funny enough there are a lot of wealthy people that live in this County, but the percentage of wealth is very small. So, many events are simple venues that everyone in Calvert County can go out and enjoy. Events are usually an eclectic mix of people which definitely make any event more interesting and exciting. The day of the fashion show was here and our group was emailing to get the scoop on what each other was wearing. It's a typical girl thing to do. You certainly don't want to be the bum of the group. Plus, I feel if you look good, you feel good, and you will give of a confidence that everyone will feel too. Most of the time you won't even know your doing it.

Patty wanted us to meet at her house at 5:30p.m. for cocktails before the show. This is a tough time for me, but the doors to fashion show opened up at 6:30. So 5:30 was an appropriate time before to get together. Two of the P's, Ann and Katie, wanted me to come pick them up on the way to Patty's house. I am usually the designated driver because I don't really drink. On occasion I get a wild hair up my ass and let my hair down for a night. This was not the night though. I had to get home and get up early to go the Vintage Source and then rush to be home by 9am for Ian's first lacrosse game. So, driving wasn't going to be a problem. After picking up Ann and Katie, we headed over to Patty's house. I was running late, so this meant half of the group was arriving late to the cocktail party because I was driving. I don't like to be late for things at all. People set times for a reason. What is being fashionably late anyway? Half of the people that arrive late look as if their alarm never went off. They aren't show stoppers. Most of the time, they are people that were on the bottom of the list anyway. Now, I am not saying that I have never been late to anything. I am saying I don't like to be. Being a few minutes late is OK. A half an hour is pushing it. Anything over a half an hour is flat out rude! Usually your friends understand or you have told the hostess already that you may be running a little late. This is acceptable. Usually the late comers are the late leavers. I can't stand to be the last one to leave, unless I am at a good friends house. My husband Pat has a tendency to be a late leaver. It's so f-----g annoying. What would one of my blogs be if I didn't throw Pat under the bus just once. Once Pat has a few drinks and he is feeling good, he wants to keep that good feeling going all night long. I don't mean in the sac either. We were at one of our good friends house one night and Pat was really overstaying his welcome in my opinion. Even though everyone was having a great time, you could tell everyone was also pooping out. Pat wasn't close to being finished. Since I am usually the sober one, I can pick up on the subtle clues of "Please Leave". Pat usually has a buzz or is drunk, so how can pick up on any cues? How about listening to your wife. How about that? It got to the point were the host starting stripping down to his boxers to get Pat and a couple of others to leave. It took a second for these drunks to realize "Oh, I guess we better leave." Now every time we go over to this friends house, all he has to say is he getting ready to strip down and everyone gets the message.

When we got to Patty's house, she was running around a little crazy looking for the fashion show tickets. The tickets were presold and none would be sold at the door. That started off the evening interesting already. I thought everyone looked great. Missy was actually putting her make-up on when we arrived. We all were actually suppose to do make-up over Patty's. I actually forgot all about that. We just had cocktails over at Patty's house. They were suppose to serve us one drink and appetizers at the fashion show. This was included in your ticket price. We headed to the fashion show and Patty squared the ticket situation with the ladies at the show. It was all good. We were in. It was pretty crowded. They had local vendors there of women owned businesses. That was cool. They also had a backdrop like you would see at the Oscars or Emmy's where the stars would get their picture taken with their award. I got one picture taken with my mother-in-law and one with the "P" crew. When the "P" crew got up to take a picture, all of a sudden a few cameras were snapping shots. They must have taken 10 pictures of our group. I will post a photo if I can get one. "I am starving! Where are all these appetizers?" This was the only shitty thing about the night. The appetizers were good, if you could get one. I finally started camping out at the kitchen door so I could get them as they came out. I still only got like two. They never came out. And, when they did, they had about 10 appetizers on a serving plate that was the size of a salad plate. I finally said to the girl, "What is up with this? Why aren't you using a big serving platter? You can't serve all these people like this." She said, I had a platter but some people knocked it over so I got a smaller plate. Simple answer from a simple girl. What an idiot. Where was the person in charge of food service? I shouldn't have grilled her because she never came back out and I was STARVING!!!! They finally started to let people upstairs for the fashion show. I was close to the front of the line but then moved out of line for a reason I can't remember. I was probably digging through the trash for food I was so hungry. Anyway, our group got up late and got shitty seats. It was still fun though. Some of the models looked nervous and some worked it. Some of the cloths and bags and hats were very cute. I do think they could have set the room up better for everyone to see better.

We finally left and headed to Neptunes Bar where the first order of business for me was FOOD! I was also excited to me Ann's new man. The last guys name should have been Spider Man. I won't get into that but it was scary. Chuck was losing points when it looked like he was trying to be fashionably late. I will say that it was the bar clock that was fast because when I checked my watch and phone time, he was only a few minutes late. I was pleasantly surprised. They seemed to be a good fit. Have you heard of getting "jumped in"? Well its a term gangs use when they initiate a member into the gang. The gang actually beats the crap out of the person wanting to join in. If they can stand being beat up badly by the group than they are worthy to be a member of the gang. We won't make Chuck "jump in" just yet. We have to give him time to see if he is worth even being part of this exclusive club. Actually Ann has to say he is the one. My short little interview with him was really good. He told me exactly what I wanted to hear. So, either he was very genuine or very clever. I will say genuine. I've been around and it's not easy to con me. At one point before Chuck showed up, Pussy Pussy asked me if she had drunk hair. Funny enough she didn't . She was good to go when her new man showed up. After observing them for a while she seemed really happy. That makes me happy. Hopefully this one will be a keeper. If he doesn't work out, I guy named Marc Goodman(Guppy) at the fashion show had his sights on Ann. Picture this; A Wispy,White-haired guy in a suit, Navy blue jacket, buttoned down collared shirt to show his hairy white chest, dress slacks, and penny loafers. He told me to let him know if it didn't work out for Ann. Ann is the last really single girl in the group. Hopefully this isn't pressuring her into finding someone to settle down with. I really don't think this is the case though. I wish her all the best. She deserves it.