U Survived Another Summer By Doc

Yes Doc, you are absolutely right. Here I was posting on Facebook about how happy I was that the kids were finally back in school, when a get a text from you, one of my very best friends in the whole world, Doc(strictly said for his benefit since he may read this). " U survived another summer. Can't wait to read the blog" is what the text said. Of course he is not being sincere when he says this. If you know Doc, you know its meant to be funny. He really believes that I am a lady of leisure. Even though I am to some degree, I still have a crappy job, and if you are a mother, you know what I mean. I am not going to start listing my jobs because that is just ridiculous. I am not even going to justify what I do. You just won't understand this if you have a penis. Even though you may be stressed out, it is a different kind of stress, like where are my underwear, or I'm out of antiperspirant, can you pick some up or where are my shoes, have you seen them or what are you making for dinner, which is the most annoying question you can ask me! It's not that I don't want to make dinner, it's just that it really bugs me that it always has to be me. I know! Blah, Blah, blah..........

Anyway, I will say that I had a very easy first day of school. Connor started back a Calvert this year, so there is no drama getting to the bus in the mornings anymore. All the kids ride the same bus to school. So far there has been no drama in the morning regarding showers. It all seems to be working out so far. Thank god for that! I can't stand yelling and fighting but yelling and fighting in the morning would most likely push me over the edge. Speaking of getting pushed over the edge...........

Every year I take a picture of the kids at the bus stop while they wait for the bus and every year they are a complete pain in the ass about it. You think they would learn it would be over faster if they didn't fight it. This year on the way to the bus stop they saw me pull the camera out. "OH MY GOD MOM! ARE YOU SERIOUS. WELL YOU NOT TAKING A PICTURE OF ME" Then Regan and Ian chime in, "ME EITHER". To this I say "THING 1, THING 2, AND THING 3 HAVE TWO CHOICES, YOU CAN EITHER TAKE A NICE PICTURE TOGETHER AT THE BUS STOP BEFORE THE BUS COMES OR WHEN THE BUS PULLS UP, I CAN PUT ON MY FLASH AND LIGHT THE SKY UP TAKING PICTURES AS YOU WALK TO GET ON THE BUS!" Thing 3(Ian) responded very quickly with an OK, OK, I vote for before the bus comes. Connor and Regan followed suit. So I got my pretty little picture. They were actually smiling and let me also take a group photo with the other kids.

We are Moving!

Imagine having older, unappreciative, spoiled, non-conforming, lazy-azz kids. You have the picture in your head? Well, that is my life. On a good note, my kids aren't drug addicts, sex addicts, dangerous to others, misbehaved around others, or dumb-azzes as far as school goes. That I guess I can be grateful for, but the other 50% is annoying as hell. Furthermore, I know this is typical of their ages. Even though this is true, it's old. NO MORE EXCUSES!

I hate, hate, hate, telling my kids more than once to do something or to stop doing something. My favorite line in the house that all three of the kids use is "NOT ME. I DIDN'T DO IT." That's funny because you and I are the only ones here and I sure as hell didn't do it. To this they just smile and realize I am no dummy. Seriously, do they really think I fell off of some turnip truck? Some of my favorite lines I use are "I AM NOT YOUR DAMN MAID. ----"AM I SPEAKING CHINESE BECAUSE I SWEAR I JUST TOLD YOU TO DO SOMETHING AND I AM PRETTY SURE I WAS SPEAKING IN ENGLISH?-----HERE, LET ME PULL IT OUT OF MY ASS FOR YOU, HOW THE HELL DO I KNOW WHERE YOU PUT YOUR THINGS.-----and my favorite "OH MY GOD, EVEN STEVIE WONDER CAN SEE THAT."

As much as I yell, you have to have some comic relief in there for everyone. And even thought the kids find me annoying as much as I find them annoying, they do find something funny in these lines. But, the last line I used on them, they didn't find funny at all. After a while you have to find new tactics to get what you want done. "WE ARE MOVING". They didn't like this one little bit. " If you want to treat a million dollar home like this, I will sell it to someone who will appreciate it." They saw me looking at homes the other day and asked what I was doing. I said I was just looking, I always look to see what is out there. Do you think they could have put two and two together. I am a real estate agent you know, and I do have a few clients right now. They thought I was looking for me. LOL! So I used it against them later. I told them I was running errands and I would be back in a couple of hours. I wanted everything in tip top shape when I got back. They have been so lazy over the summer. To get them to anything is a struggle. The house has gone to shit since they have been home. I can't keep up so I finally had it out with them. I guess they didn't like the idea of changing schools and meeting new friends. So when I got home, It was spic and span. Its only been two days but they are definitely on their toes more so than before.

Happy Birthday to you Ian!

Some parents give their children a Birthday Party every year, and I think its ridiculous. We don't do that. I'm sure some people think that is ridiculous. I actually had a girlfriend judge me on not giving my kids a birthday party every year on their birthday. I think she was a little shocked when I told her to "KISS MY ASS! At least when I have a party for my kids I don't complain about doing it! Unlike you, I actually am genuinely excited for them and excited to plan it for them." Planning parties every year would get old and even more difficult to do it better then next year. We have birthday parties on big birthdays such as 10, 13, 16 and 18 etc. Parties are expensive and I refuse to do it every year. After a while it means nothing to these kids. They expect it. Don't get me wrong, we still have a little family get together and celebrate their birthday but we don't have a big friend party.

This year Ian had his first friend birthday party ever. He was so excited! I was excited for him because he actually waited an extra year to have it. He wanted a pool party and being that his birthday is in November, a pool party just wouldn't work out. He also finished 5th grade so we could also do it graduation style. You can invite as many people as you want and get to get whatever party favors you want and the list goes on and on. I take care of everything. Well, I thought my wrist was going to fall off writing these invites out.

I think in the end, Ian had about 30 or so kids. He made out like a bandit. I don't think he was even thinking of gifts until they started to hand them to him. He was just happy to be having his party that he waited 11 years for. He actually went and spent his money finally. He was so excited. He still has some gift cards left. It's crazy. Maybe I should have a party for me. Oh wait, we actually did that last year. I did clean up. I wasn't even expecting anything either. I was just excited to have everyone celebrate my 40th with me.

The moral of the story, good things come to those who wait.

Deep Creek cont.......

There has been a little break in my entry of Deep Creek because I wasn't actually sure what to write. I like to write a story as it is, but I have been forced to sweep this story under the rug. But, luckily I can tell you that the rest of the trip was successful. Ian and his buddy went fishing with Pat early one morning and caught a few fish. I did think it was weird they came back that morning and Pat said that they caught no fish.

Later I asked Ian and his buddy, Ty, why were they out so long if they weren't catching anything. They said they were catching fish, but dad kept throwing them back. Pat did that the first night we were there too. We caught a few fish on the pier and he tossed them back. I was even annoyed when he did that, so I can imagine how the boys felt. They wanted to eat them!

In the afternoon we dropped Connor off to play golf. It was pouring down rain, but he didn't care. He ended up shooting a 32 on nine. I'm glad I didn't play. When Connor is on, he is on. He has a pretty damn good short game. Of course, that is the part he practices the most. I hate praticing, especially right now while its so hot. It's all I can do to muster up the energy to go work out or ride my bike on the off days of the gym. Maybe that's why I have become such a fat ass.

Later that evening, we had a little family arguement...................

This is where the story ends.

Deep Creek Journal - Day 1- boat drop

Within an hour of being at the cabin, Pat and Sean decided they wanted to drop the boat. This was a lot of firsts for Sean, towing our boat to Deep Creek, and now, launching the boat. Both are not easy things to do. And, when you are in the mountains on small roads, it becomes a little trickier. Pat and Sean go to move the trailer and spend about 45 minutes getting it out of the driveway. Sean parked the boat in a very odd spot. How he even got it in this spot in the first place is a small miracle. Anyway, we finally head out. Sean set his GPS for a gas station so we could fill up before launching on the lake. We drive and drive. According to the GPS, we have about 500 yards to go. As we get closer, I am thinking, "There is no way there is a gas station up ahead. We are in the middle of nowhere." I don't say anything, because I already have a bad rap for being opinionated and always right. When I start asking questions that question the situation, I am looked at as bitchy. So, I just bite my tongue. Biting my tongue is not an easy thing to do. We come to the end of the 500 yards and all there is is grass. So we turn around and just decide to go to the park and drop the boat.

At the park, Sean goes to back up the boat. This is not an easy task your first time. Pat and I actually have two separate ways to back up a trailer. I believe my way is the best way obviously and Pat thinks that I'm an idiot and the best way is his way. Whatever, I really don't give a damn as long as the job gets done. So there is a lot of maneuvering on Sean's part, but he finally gets the boat launched and we get in and take off. As Pat and I leave for the dock, I ask him if he knows where he is going and he says yes. Well that makes me feel better because this is a pretty big lake. You can't really see a lot of houses from the shore and everything looks the same.

The more we drive, the more I realize that Pat really doesn't have a clue. He just said he did, so I didn't start riding his ass hard about asking someone. Of course, I get annoyed and start questioning Pat for his lousy choices. I know this is probably annoying for him, but he annoys me as well. We are both first borns. This horn locking is going to happen. Sometimes you wish it didn't happen so often as it does. Oh well. "Oh my god, isn't that the neighbor's flag Pat?" How I saw that needle in a haystack, I have no clue. Pat can live to see another day. Crises averted.

Deep Creek Journal - Day 1 -entry 2

So the kids took off in Walmart and took off straight for a section they weren't suppose to be going to. I chased them. "We are not buying electronics! I said to grab a 12 pack of soda you want to drink." I hate it when the kids look at you like you have two heads. I'm not speaking chinese, I swear. So we all take off to grab the soda's. Three hundred dollars later, we are back on the road. We really didn't have that much further to go. The kids were really starting to get on my nerves though. I found myself saying to myself over and over in my head. "Are we flipping there yet?" As I am quietly freaking out in my mind, thinking about how I much I wanted to freak out outloud for the whole world to hear, I actually did freak out. "OH MY GOD! PAT, I TOTALLY FORGOT CLAIR'S GIFT!" This was seriously, the whole reason for the stop in the first place. Then the kids distracted me from the true task at hand. Pat was pissed. I was pissed. What the hell do we do now. It is her birthday. As we go closer to the cabin Pat saw this little po dunk store in the middle of nowhere. I just rolled my eyes and thought "yeah right", what a waste of time. When we walked in, I couldn't believe what I saw.
A whole isle of things for little girls! Score! We loaded up with everything we could find and we were on our way.
Finally at the cabin, we unloaded and settled in. The kids gave tours to all there friends and hung out. The kids went fishing and Pat settled in with his booz. I was glad to finally be at our destination.

Deep Creek Journal - Day 1

Last November, for Thanksgiving, the Healey family went to Deep Creek. Some of us went to a golf tournament and after the tournament bid on a house in Deep Creek in a live auction. Obviously, we won. While we were at this pretty, pretty, nice cabin in Deep Creek, Pat's Brother Sean said that he liked the place so much, he was going to rent it in the summer for a week. The price the family charges for a week at their cabin is pretty cheap. Lets say it's about just a forth of what most places charge and the place is pretty incredible. Well, right when I heard that, I was thinking "Have a good time. I'm going to the beach." I am a beach kind of girl. My idea of vacation is going to the beach, staying at a Hotel, and eating out at night. I also like to wake up in the morning and go for a walk and I love, love, love to sit on the deck and listen to the ocean.
When you go to Deep Creek, you have to pack everything except the kitchen sink. I HATE THAT! My idea of vacation is not taking care of another house. I could stay at home and do that. What? You also have to clean the place up when you leave? This couldn't be further from what I want to do! What? You have to cook your own meals, and clean your own dishes! Where is the vacation in that. We use to do this when the kids were little. We would rent a place in Ocean City and do the same crap. After doing that for a few years. Pat and I finally agreed that it is a lot of work. We said we would never do it again! Now, here we are ten years later doing the same shit all over again.
"Ungrateful! How about realistic!" This was my reply to Pat when he ran the idea past me a few months ago and I flat out said "NO!" without even a thought. He said I was ungrateful. Connor, Regan, and Ian or I like to refer to them as thing one, thing two, and thing three, are very lazy. I know its going to come down to the final day where you have to clean up all your shit and I am going to be holding the bag. It's bullshit! I just think the whole idea is to stressful. It's going to cause a fight with Pat and I and it most certainly did. Why does he think he can just make the decision to go to lake without any care of concern of mine? He knew I was adamant about not going to Deep Creek. He still made the decision the family would go.
So here we are in the driveway ready to leave. The kids are loaded up in the car with their friends and the dog is breathing and drooling heavy on my pillow, which nobody felt was necessary to move while I was packing up THEIR shit! And, why is everyone sitting in the car while we pack it anyway? Typical kids these days. They feel that they are entitled to everything and give nothing in return. Well, I got news for you thing one, two, and three, I am the rock star in the house! You three are my loyal audience. You do what I want you to do and what I want you to do right now is get your three lazy a$$es up and help. Needless to say, the trip was not starting off well.
We dropped the dog off at the kennel, stopped at the daycare center to drop off Pat's mom's bowls, stopped for gas, stopped on the sided of the road to let Thing One Pee, and then had to stop a few miles later to let Thing 2 and her friend pee. Have you ever felt you were never going to get where you were trying to go? This was the never ending journey to the middle of nowhere with no place to go once you got there.
When we got to the rest stop, it was at the kushwa memorial bridge. It was the rest stop at the opening of the mountain right before Cumberland I think. Anyway, the girls run to the restroom and the boys ran up the stairs that go up the side of the mountain. I guess it was just a little place you could walk up and take in the view. I stood by the car and looked down the mountain. Pat walked over a few minutes later to take in the view and smoke a cig. We stood there for a while. While standing there, all I could think of is why are all the tractor trailers honking. It's so annoying! Then I starting thinking that the kids have been gone a while. Wait a minute! Are they on the bridge egging the drivers on to honk? I ran to the car to grab my camera just in case. I ran as fast as I could to the road to look up at the bridge. Of course, It was Thing two and three with their friends pumping their arms at every truck driver coming in both directions. Horns were blowing nonstop. It was a pretty hilarious sight. I let them go at it for another few minutes. What the hell, they couldn't hear me yell for them anyway.
We had one more stop to make before the cabin and that was at the super walmart grocery store. There are really no stores once you get to the cabin. We have been told that there is a grocery store on the water but we haven't been there and are not really sure what is in there. The main purpose of the store was to get Clair a quick present. She will be celebrating her birthday when we get to the cabin.
We get to the Walmart and the kids took off.